As readers of my blogs may have guessed, I enjoy George Bush jokes. I recently heard one that was new to me and am re-telling it below, having updated it somewhat.
A private jet ‘plane carrying five passengers is about to crash. There are, however, only four parachutes.
One passenger is Cristiano Ronaldo who says, “I’m the best footballer in the world. I’ve just been transferred to Real Madrid for a record fee. I’ve got millions of fans all over the world and if I died it would devastate them.” So he takes a parachute and jumps.
The second passenger, Gordon Brown, says, “I am the Prime Minister of Great Britain and am trying to lead my country and, indeed, the world through the current economic crisis. It would cause enormous problems if I were to die now.” He takes a parachute and jumps.
The third passenger, George W Bush, says, “I am the previous President of the United States of America. I have not yet written my memoirs and I want the opportunity of correcting a few miscontraceptions regarding my suitability for the presidency. I cannot therefore die now, so must also have a parachute.” He too jumps.
That leaves just two passengers, an old man and a schoolboy. The old man says to the boy: “I have lived a long and enjoyable life but you have yours ahead of you. It is only right that you have the last parachute.”
The boy replies: “Thank you, sir, but there are two parachutes left. That last man grabbed my school bag…”
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